Too Late.... Never

'Love is life’ they say it right
Agitated & ruthless he searches for a sight
A shadow that is behind him all the time
Persistent like in all battles,
He is sure to find….

Hiding in dark, those beautiful eyes
Glittering with pride, waiting worthwhile
For whom she argued with world, her protector
He is the one, her heart tells her


Agony & Pain clear in his eyes
Fighter, he is, ready to pay the price
Like a light a thought strikes
Standstill he smiles and closes his eyes
Joy in her eyes turn into confusion
Why is he smiling? Or is it her hallucination?
Her secret cant be out, she is sure
Then what made him look so self assured


Her beautiful voice murmuring chants
Feeling her near, he opens his hands
Pain takes over him, and he can’t stand anymore
‘Where are you Luv?’ Words coming out from him no-more
Witty as she is, wants to play some more
‘He is a warrior; he can’t give up so soon’


But then, there he is so tired and beaten
I have to come out, come out of my cocoon
‘She can’t be far, but why then I can’t see her?’
‘Oh God, why is it so hard to live without her’
‘Life can’t be so cruel, so why is this pain so hard to bear?’
‘My ray of hope is nowhere, and there is just darkness everywhere?’


‘Oh my luv, I am here’
‘Open your eyes and you will see me everywhere’
‘Why is he not opening his eyes, he can hear me no more?’
‘Oh, why is this game of luv not a game anymore’


A flash of light so bright, & there is sound of bell
Is this heaven or way to the hell?
Yes, this is the place I belong
Everything is here, Then why didn’t she come along?


She holds him, like sand in hand
He can't leave, this doesn't make any sense
Moments ago he was standing in front of her
She was coming to him, bits remained there
and now...."Too Late" has turned to "Never"

Experience

Its such a strange world... our daily life makes us feel everything is usual around us... life, maynot be too easy, but is going at a good pace. You feel you have just enuf reasons to survive and be happy and then suddenly you see other side of coin, a side which is not so monotonous, each day is different from other.. sun rises with new challenges, and ends on with a learning.Last few days have been totally different experience for me... EXPERIENCE, yes that is the right word to describe what all I felt. Sometimes, a small incident teaches u so much... World, people and life still makes me wonder
I was walking back home from office one evening, and the weather was so beautiful, I decided to sit on a bench outside my office for sometime to enjoy cool breeze... So here I was sitting and enjoying the wonders of nature - trees dancing on the tune of winds, birds complaining drizzle. Everyone who passed me by was enjoying the weather, but unfortunately not as lucky as me and could not sit and enjoy the view for some more time :), except one girl. I saw her coming in my direction from far and she was walking unsteadily. Something about her made me keep looking. I noticed, she was very pretty with curly hair ( first person i found looking pretty with curls)... but her eyes, they were odd... as she came closer, i realized i was right, there was something very odd about her eyes, they were swelled. Well, before I started scruitinizing her more, she came and sat beside me. I tried to move my concentration back to the wonderful weather, but I just couldnt get my mind off her. All I was thinking, why are her eyes so swelled, has she been crying all night, or maybe she was in night shift and lack of sleep or maybe poor girl was sick.
So, here I was, debating inside with what could be the problem with this beautiful person, forgetting myself for a moment. Before I could make up my mind on what could be the problem and get off it my head, I saw her lit a cigratte. She started taking puffs, and as I am alergic to smell, I couldnt bear the smell. I politly asked her to put off the smoke, as I could not bear the smell. She looked at me and with tumbling voice asked me to move away if I had problem.All of a sudden my sympathies turned into hatred, and I decided I shouldnt bother about this girl and should go back to my weather which by that time felt so left alone without my notice that it became dull.
But, I didnt move from my place, i dont know why... After sometime, she threw away her cigratte, and said sorry and stood up to leave. With that one act, she all of a sudden became my friend and I couldnt stop myself from asking why does she smoke? Teacher's blood inside me started a lecture with hazardeous effects of it. She listened to me patiently and then said, sometimes you know what you are doing is wrong, but it provides you a moment of bliss and at times that one moment means lot more than entire life.
I was confused, how could a puff makes such a big difference in somebody;s life. I mean look at me, if i smoke i dont know about bliss, but i will get asthama for sure...Anyways, I realized I was crossing my line, just to continue the conversation( I was in no hurry to go home), I asked her where she works and words between her and me started flowing. After 15-20 mins, my anxiety to know about her eyes outshadowed any other topic, and i decided to cross the line and ask, rather than thinking whole day about it. So, no matter how prudent it sounded, I asked her, why her eyes were swelling?
She looked at me, totally shocked, and kept staring. That was one moment, I wont forget, I was scared- no, I was embarrrased for prying-maybe, but the question was out of my head, and i was feeling much lighter.After a couple of minutes, she asked me how old am I? and I was totally unprepared for that question, I mean cmon what has my age to do with her swollen eyesBut, just to make her feel more comfortable, I answered I am 24. She asked " You are young, do you have a boy-friend?". Now cmon, definitely the answer to that question would not affect her eyes, I was damn sure. So I asked her why is she asking these questions.She smiled, and said " Either you dont have one or you are one of the rare girls whose boy-friend cares" Definitely, either ways, I am the lucky one, but again, I had so many questions on my face, she decided not to increase them and answered my original question
"When you truely love someone, you give him your heart and soul and you expect the same in return. More than often, you are disappointed. If you are lucky, you would come to know in early stages of your life, but there are people like me, who come to know about it just when its too late"
Now cmon, I am among those people who believe no-one can push you to a moment where you lose control of yourself, so how can someone not loving you back can make you so weak.I told her the same, and she smiled at me, and agreed, but her next few lines blew me out. All she said was " I am married to him, and I realized it after marrying him :) So here I am, carrying out a relation which means everything to me and nothing to him. I love him from heart and soul and nothing of me makes him love me. He is that perfect stranger to me whom even after having, I cant say is mine"
I was speechless. All that came in mind was this line I ones read
" Worst kind of loneliness is to be sitting next to the person and knowing he/she can never be yours"
She just walked away, and I didnt know what to say. I still didnt got the answer I had asked at first, but it didnt matter anymore...I dont know her name, I dont know exact location of her office, I am not even sure if I ever will meet her, but yes, I learnt something today, something I cant describe in words, but for sure would remain with me forever as an experience...

Shreevatsa- an orphanage from eyes of my friend Srija

To give you all a little background, SOFOSH or Soceity of Friends of Sasoon Hospital is a NGO which has an arm "Shreevatsa" where abandoned infants are brought and raised till the age of 6 ( they are adopted by that age). Special kids are also raised in this beautiful home. I recently went to this place with two of my collogues- Srija & Shraddha. We all were deeply affected and my friend Srija penned her experience as below:
Was I visiting an orphanage for the first time? No. Was I involved with charity for the first time? No. Yet, there was excitement…an unexplained happiness at the mere thought of visiting an orphanage to donate clothes and other accessories collected from our office. As pre-decided, Ankita, Shraddha and I reached SOFOSH at 11 in the morning. After completing the formalities, we moved to Sreevatsa where children from 0 to 6 yrs are housed. I knew I was stepping into a different world the moment I crossed the gate to enter into the premises of Sreevatsa. Soon, my ears were filled with sounds of infants crying, toddlers screaming, kids laughing…some vying for attention while still some conveying they either wanted to play or are hungry.

It was a busy hour. It was time for lunch. The mothers’ (that’s how the caretakers are addressed) were busy feeding infants in the age group of 3 to 6 months. While some gobbled down the food hungrily, some were savouring it and yes! There were a few who put up a hard fight to not let the food enter their mouth.

The In-Charge welcomed us with a broad smile, and after accepting the ‘gifts’ we brought for the kids she took us around showing us the kitchen where all the meals are prepared and have to pass quality test everyday. She then took us to a section where kids from 0 to 6 months are cared for, and to where outsiders are not allowed in, lest they may pass on any infection on to kids. So, we stood at the threshold and watched them play, turn to their sides, and then all of a sudden a kid looked at us and gave a wide toothless smile and then he gave another. I am sure there’s no need to mention that this lit up not only mine but my colleagues’ face too.

We were transfixed until the words of the In-Charge requesting us to move on to the next section (housing 6 months to 1 year olds) brought us back to the real world. But that was only for a few fleeting seconds. Soon we were transcended to the beautiful world yet again. At the entrance of the section we were greeted by a year old boy who was enjoying his act of pulling out clothes from the almirah. And then our attention was caught by a high-pitch cry of a baby lying in the cradle. A mother deftly making her way through cradles and kids playing on the floor, holding a tray filled with cap full of different colored medicines, administering them to the kids who required it, mentioned the baby had constipation. And I realized that along with the medicine what the baby required to ease the pain was human touch – For, the moment Shraddha held the baby in her arms she stopped crying. The baby named Kanishka was a special child.

My attention was drawn towards another baby who lay in the cradle quiet. She too was a special child. And, somehow I had this feeling she was enjoying the attention I was giving her. Ankita too was drawn towards this kid. Soon the kid was in the arms of Ankita, enjoying the cozy comfort of her arms. But she broke into cry the moment Ankita lay her back in the cradle. Those few moments made me realize how badly these kids yearned for human touch! Yes they do, because every mother out there has to take care of four kids.

Sure, it’s a different world - a world, which I would like to visit again – to help these little angels.

Not All's Wrong with New Generation

I completed this novel today "Wise & Otherwise" written by Sudha Murty. To tell you all a little about this noble writer, she is a philantropist, better half of Narayana Murty-founder of Infosys. To know more about this lady, her credentials and her work, goto following link

Wise & Otherwise is a compilation of Sudha's experiences while she completes her philantropist errands. The one that essentially moved me is the following conversation she had with her son:

She asked him to name three most important revolutions or ideas of twentieth century

Following is what her son has to say:
Principles of non-violence, effect of violence and impact of communication media

First one because- when India was enslaved for centuries, when we did not have any power to make our decisions, a thin little man started a new kind of movement without bloodshed. No weapons, no money, but a message to the rulers: “We will not cooperate with you, come what may”. He won freedom for India with this new thinking. He really deserved the Nobel Prize for Peace. He was Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, the father of our nation. His revolutionary ideas influenced leaders like Martin Luther King jr, Nelson Mandela and Aung San Suu Kyi, in gaining freedom for people.

The second idea was almost during the same period, but in reverse direction. This man believed in the idea of hatred. He thought he could rule people with weapons and violence. He killed people like flies. He never understood the meaning of love and kindness. He could not bring peace by his method and became the cause for World War II. Millions of people suffered because of him and his policies. His life is the best example of war, intolerance and prejudice. He was Adolf Hitler.

Today the world has shrunk because of mass media. In a matter of seconds, we come to know what is happening anywhere in the world. Televison and internet are a part of it. This has cut the cost of communication and barriers of disappearing. You can see its effect in business world as well in social life. That doesn’t mean we are losing our old culture, but I can say we’re exposed to other cultures also.

“The one who acquires knowledge should be respected, irrespective of age, gender or class”

Chetan Bhagat @ Symbiosis,Pune

Sorry Guys, I was suppose to upload something on heat, but just couldnt move away from temptation of poting this article:

Inaugural Speech for the new batch at the Symbiosis BBA program, Pune By Chetan Bhagat

Good Morning everyone and thank you for giving me this chance to speak to you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this college, leaving the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my new classmates - there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.
Where do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-year old twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut their own birthday cake.
I see students like you, and I still see some sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the spark?
Imagine the spark to be a lamp's flame. The first aspect is nurturing - to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to guard against storms.
To nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is possible for you. It isn't any external measure - a certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.
Most of us are from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement. But it isn't the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr. Ambani would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore. Steve Jobs won't be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come to work everyday? They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that next level is important.
Nature designed with a random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature's design. Are you? Goals will help you do that.
I must add, don't just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.
There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.
You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school, where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One last thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the yoga practice. The teacher said - don't be serious, be sincere. This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.
I've told you three things - reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.
Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don't go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you. But it's life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember - if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that's where you want to be.
Disappointment's cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don't know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release. Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning how to write scripts, having a side plan – I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life - friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.
Unfairness - this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it – not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people luckier than you. In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and understand this speech in English means you are pretty damm lucky by Indian standards. Let's be grateful for what we have and get the strength to accept what we don't. I have so much love from my readers that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don't get literary praise. It's ok. I don't look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It's ok. Don't let unfairness kill your spark.
Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.
There you go. I've told you the four thunderstorms - disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.
I welcome you again to the most wonderful years of your life. If someone gave me the choice to go back in time, I will surely choose college. But I also hope that ten years later as well, your eyes will shine the same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark alive, not only through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I hope not just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something cool about saying - I come from the land of a billion sparks.
Thank You!

Pulitzer 1994 (Kevin Carter)

This is the text that is printed in fine print under the picture:

The PHOTO is the "Pulitzer prize" winning photo taken in 1994 during the Sudan famine. The picture depicts a famine stricken child crawling towards an United Nations food camp, located a kilometer away.>The vulture is waiting for the child to die so that it can eat it. This picture shocked the whole world. No one knows what happened to the child, including the photographer Kevin Carter who left the place as soon as the photograph was taken.>Three months later he committed suicide due to depression.

This is what the photographer had to say after he took the photograph:

Dear God,I promise I will never waste my food no matter how bad it can taste and how full I may be. I pray that He will protect this little boy, guide and deliver him away from his misery. I pray that we will be more sensitive towards the world around us and not be blinded by our own selfish nature and interests. I hope this picture will always serve as a reminder to us that how fortunate we are and that we must never ever take things for granted.Let's make a prayer for the suffering in anywhere anyplace around the globe and send this friendly reminder to others Think & look at this...when you complain about your food and the food we wasted daily.......

Thanks,

Ankita

P.S. The next pic would be on heat.. So watch out for that mates....